Thoughts I’ve Had Using Tinder:

★ It’s too easy to accidentally swipe right when you’re in the habit of viewing the rest of someone’s pictures and have a moment of panic that they might right-swipe you back.
★ It’s too easy to accidentally swipe left and suffer a moment of loss, as a chance to match is now impossible.
★ I want to meet you, not your dog, not your cat, and definitely not that meme you like. If you’re not in the picture, you’re not getting my right-swipe.
★ You might look great in group pictures, but if you’re not alone in any of your pictures, did you really think I’d go back and forth trying to narrow down which one you might be?
★ If you insist on having nothing but group pictures and everyone is attractive in every picture, I’ll probably swipe right. When we match I’ll panic realizing I still don’t know what you look like.
★ Why does your bio have your Instagram username? Did you think I was going to close Tinder, look for your Instagram, browse your pictures, then return to Tinder to decide if you’re a left or a right swipe?
★ I know you’re shy or thought it would be creative to hide your face in all of your pictures, but I don’t know what you’re doing on Tinder because you’re not making your case as to why you’re a right-swipe.
★ Why did you right-swipe me if you’re going to ignore my message?
★ Yes! -You’re only 5 miles away…386 miles away the next day? Oh, you were just on vacation.
★ Why are you showing me people of a gender which I have not asked you to show me?
★ Please don’t tell me “Tinderella” is going to be added to the dictionary.
★ “Humanitarians Of Tinder,” and “Tigers On Tinder” (Note: I personally haven’t seen one girl with a tiger on Tinder.)


4 thoughts on “Tindering

  1. How annoying is tinder! Every point is what I agree with I HATE group pictures! Especially if they have 3/4 of all the same group!, then they’ll match and no reply, like what do you do when you match ? Should you message something about meeting first?

  2. I use a different dating site and I’m thinking of quitting it. Nearly everyone on there is either married and looking to fool around on the side, not married and just looking for a quickie, or they just want phone sex or sexting. There isn’t anyone real. And the few who are real are so jaded from all the bad ones on the site, they won’t even answer you or take you seriously.

    My favorite are the ones who have a pic up with half of some woman cut off, so you are left wondering if that’s his wife, girlfriend, what that he’s trying to hide. Then there’s rebound guy who says he just left a long term marriage/relationship. Forget that. And midlife crisis guy who thinks he is suddenly twenty again when he’s really fifty and up. Also, guys who never smile in their profile pic and look mean. Are we seriously supposed to answer them when they look like they have rage issues or they just walked out of a funeral? Starting to wonder if it’s even possible to really meet anyone online.

    • I have been on (and am still on) quite a few dating sites. Each has something I do and don’t like about it. For the most part there are some decent people on all of them, but the tough part is having the patience to weed through all the annoying profiles, with the aspects you mentioned. Good luck!

  3. Pingback: The Flakey Comedian (Part 1) | Tired Of Dating

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