My dating website profile specifies that I am looking for guys in my age range (20’s), without children. Of course everyone else on the website is taking it as seriously as I am. Here is today’s winner, a recent message I haven’t replied to…

Random Guy: hi [MY USERNAME CENSORED] :)
I’ve been on here for less than two weeks and I think I’ve signed in twice! But your profile just came up as I was venturing into my first search and I enjoyed reading your witty responses and also thought that your photos were fabulous! So…..it would be great to chat sometime of you are interested….my profile is deliberately sparse so I’m [NAME NOT MATCHING NAME IN USERNAME CENSORED], 41 years old, 5 10, originally from England, came to [CITY CENSORED] in 2010 via Canada. I’m 100% honest and upfront and that means declarations now! Lol never married, 12 year old daughter in Canada who I visit twice a month, I’m employed, never done drugs, never cheat and am sane, positive and easy going :)
I’d love to hear from you soon :)
[NAME NOT MATCHING NAME IN USERNAME CENSORED]

Sometimes I’m not incredibly shocked, disgusted, annoyed, or amused by the messages I get, they just make me sigh…