New Years Messages

Just pay attention to the dates in these messages and reconsider not deleting messages in your inbox for this reason…

toedithaforgot-copy

Advertisements

Should I have at least thanked him for the compliment?

Maybe I was a little bitchy here, but I was bored and hadn’t replied to any messages in a while…
bitchymayvbe

Dating Website Conversation #25

Do you remember this conversation? Well, he’s changed his profile picture since then, and today he’s messaged me yet again. How pathetic is it that he hasn’t given up? Not one other person answering him? Look at the dates in this “conversation” with the most recent being from today. Notice I haven’t replied once? I’m getting tempted to, but I know that whatever I say, it won’t be very friendly…
stillgoing

Recently Ignored Messages

Honestly, I haven’t been posting a lot because I haven’t been replying to a lot of messages. Here are a few from my dating site inbox over the last couple of weeks, which I chose not to answer for various reasons…

Random Bald Guy: Hi, love your hair!
[I resisted the temptation to reply with “I bet you do.”]

Random Guy: You look just like this one celebrity, but I don’t know if I should tell you who…
-R
[That’s actually sort of a clever way to get a response. I bet some girls really want to hear who it is.]

Then there were a whole lot of those short, generic, “Hey how are you?” messages of course, and one guy who messaged me a while ago when I’d decided to take a break from guys and who admitted to not reading any of my profile before messaging me. He followed up to ask if I was dating guys again. I basically told him that I wasn’t really interested in dating anyone now and that I wanted to “find myself,” figure some stuff out in my life and so on. He replied…

Random Guy: I love that attitude. I was the same way after a bad breakup a few years ago. I think that’s the perfect way to approach dating. You need to love yourself first.
Maybe you and I aren’t so different :)
[I told him I hadn’t been dealing with any recent break-ups, and it was just an in general sort of figuring my life out thing.]
Random Guy: Well let me know if you ever want to grab a drink and talk about it.
[Why would I go on a date because I don’t want to date?]
Random Guy (2 Days Later): Or not haha

Dating Website Conversation #20

You know, guys are a lot more persistent than girls on these dating sites. Sometimes I feel like I could say anything turning down a date, and the guy will try to convince me otherwise, anyway. Today a friend said he would rather someone turn him down instead of ignoring him on these sites, and for the most part I would agree. I don’t enjoy most of my messages being ignored, so it’s not something I’d like to do to someone else. I’ve spent a lot of time replying to messages from guys I’m not interested in, just to politely turn them down. The problem is that it never ends there. A lot of the time it ends up in some weird argument with zero chance of a positive outcome. Who really wants to be on a pity date, anyway?! Tonight I got a follow up message from a guy who’s message I’d ignored a few days ago, so I decided to turn him down and yet again somehow it didn’t end there…

Random Guy: Hey I’m [NAME CENSORED]
Random Guy (5 Days Later): Why so anti I’m not shirtless
Myself: I’m not anti-social, but you didn’t send a very interesting initial message and you’re not my type attraction-wise.
Random Guy: Well you’re my type can we grab a bite and see if it there’s anything there ? I guarantee you a good time
Myself: Thanks, but I think the “my type” & “your type” kind of thing has to be mutual to work.
Random Guy: Well i might surprise you in person look you have nothing to lose and I’m treating make a fireman smile
Random Guy: We can paint at [COMPANY NAME CENSORED] it’s byob or go to the top f the [BUILDING NAME CENSORED] Building ? I have VIP passes
Myself: Thanks for the offer, but I’m just not interested.
Random Guy: Ok shallow girl just remember looks fade
Myself: Right, but I’m not shallow, I didn’t say you weren’t attractive enough for me. I just said you’re not my type. Everyone is entitled to their preference. You really don’t need to be so defensive about it. When my messages get ignored, I don’t take it so personally. Good luck on your search on here.
Random Guy: Well I bet it hurts when you get rejected I was nothing but nice and respectful to you and call me a little sensitive but it hurts ok it’s cool though
Myself: I have sent a few follow up messages after my initial message wasn’t replied to a couple of times, and unless you want to know the real reason someone didn’t answer you, don’t push them for a date. If someone is interested, they will reply. Honestly, I didn’t harshly reject you. I just don’t have typical taste in guys, is all. I’m sorry you were somehow hurt by this, but you really will run into a lot of that on these sites and you can’t really feel the same about it as you would meeting someone in person. Also know that most girls don’t reply to most messages. I know from my own experience in messaging them.
Random Guy: I know but you’re one girl that’s profile is very different and I was intrigued too be honest I’m a little persistent and I just felt you would make an awesome girlfriend I’m tired the whole dating game
Myself: It’s not all that different. There are a lot of girls on here. You’ll find a better match for yourself. Some even like that persistence, so it’ll be a better fit. I’m also tired of dating, but it doesn’t mean you can just settle.
Random Guy: You’re right and I appreciate you being nice and explaining this to me

[Well, that ended well…Unless he blows up all angry and messages me again in a few days. (That happened once.)]

Still Waiting

Well, 25 messages to girls later and only one replied –to tell me she wasn’t interested. Though, at least her message was pretty genuine and friendly. The girl who sent me a message never replied again either. I guess my next attempt will be at a bar. And my inbox continues to fill with messages from guys I’m not interested in as usual…

Random Guy: hey how are you
Myself: I’m alright, but that doesn’t matter, you weren’t actually asking. -You asked that with the same tone that every cashier ever asked you with. You know, where they don’t actually care about your answer and you give them the fake “Good.” Your message could’ve been “f98rjefe” it was just to see if you’d get a reply and not anything you really put any effort into or thought about.
Anyway, you’re just another one of those people who went to my profile, looked at my pictures, read half of one sentence from my profile, and completely missed the part that said I’m interested in dating girls at the moment, not guys.
Random Guy: Ok have fun

Random Guy: Hi,
My name is [NAME CENSORED].
I am looking for a good relationship with a nice girl.
I am shy, funny and loyal.
Please text me a message to know each other.
Have a lovely day
[PHONE NUMBER CENSORED]
Myself: Sorry, as I mentioned on my profile. I am interested in dating a girl at this time.
Random Guy: Thank you for your message
[So, do you think he sent this message to every profile he came across? Maybe he thought he’d get a random text in front of his friends and he’d say, “Its from this girl I’ve been talking to.”]
3q324i

End Of July Updates

I did it. I just sent my first dating website message to a girl. I guess recently developing my second girl-crush pushed me to it. I have no idea as to what kind of reply I’m going to get, if any. It’s all such unfamiliar territory to me, but I guess my curiosity is winning over my nervousness at this point. I don’t even know what I want the result to be in this experiment. I think it’s more about the experience than the outcome now.

The guy asking me about circumcision from my previous post yesterday finally ended his questioning with some sort of “thank you for your time.” I’m now convinced I was just surveyed for someone’s research project. His final question asked why I never gave much thought to my preference in men being circumcised or not, and asked if it was because only 10% of men in the US aren’t and I’d never been with one. My reply was “Honestly, I really just don’t ever spend much time thinking about penis’s.” That was when the questions ended.

I also have an update from my 7/29 post about relationships on FaceBook: Remember the status update that prompted me to write the post? The same person made a new status update last night, continuing with the entire theme of my post that day. –If you haven’t already, please read “Relationships On FaceBook” to make sense of this…
“hey remember that shit I said 48 hours ago about my relationship ending amicably and whatnot? hahahhahaha oh how young and naive i was”
[Followed by commenting on their own status…]
“the next time you see me sink a half a year into something, if it ain’t a screenplay, punch me in the face. i’m fucking done with this shit”
[And another of their comments…]
“Actually, fuck this. I’m inheriting the dark mindset that caused to hurt me several times in the past 48 hours. I take back what i said. I’m not done with relationships in general, I’m just done with a relationship with her”
[This will be added to the original post as well.]